I’ve always been the person that people come to for advice or just to have someone listen to them, but there’s something about that first time someone confides in you. It’s life changing. It turns everything around from the way you see that person to the tone their voice resonates inside your head.

Listen to others for reasons beyond the pleasure or the selfish gain of it; do it because everyone in this world has a story to tell, an infinite combination of a finite amount of words that somehow will need to be told in the same order by anyone else. Listen to the beauty of people’s lives: the way their eyes gleam when they tell you the happiest moment of their lives and the way the tears fall when they do the saddest.

Listen to people when they tell you about themselves because we are all unique in our own way with a composition of traits and values that is special to each one of us. Do it to earn a different perspective from their words, a new vantage point from which to analyze things. Listen because you were lucky enough to be let in no matter the circumstances; whether those words were screamed in the midst of drinks at a bar or whispered in the silence of the night, they were said for a reason.

It does not matter to whom you listen, just do it. Allow yourself to let your walls down as others do to you and grasp every detail that embodies every second of that person’s life. Let it consume you, lose yourself in their stories like you do with your favorite movies. You may not be able to change the way their life went, but the fact that you were interested enough to hear what they had to said may be enough to change the way their life will go.

Listen to others because nobody wants to feel alone. Whether it’s giving your sister advice on her relationship and what dress would go better with her skin tone or helping an acquaintance deal with feelings of depression and the hardships of life, everyone wants to feel as if there is someone in this world who will be willing to listen to them whenever they need it. Humans seek comfort within others because we can relate no matter the scale or importance of it.

Sparing someone five minutes of your time could make the difference between life and death, no matter how extreme that sounds. Listening to someone and giving your input on the things that are bothering them could make their day go better than they had previously expected and that’s a luxury we shouldn’t deny anyone of. Giving anyone that comfort and knowing that you made a difference makes everything better for both parties involved.

Finally, listen to others because it will serve as a reminder that there is more to this life than what you make of it. Everywhere around you, no matter where you go, there are people who have their own concerns, desires, aspirations, fears, struggles, and ideals, and unless you make an effort to tune yourself into their mind, you will forever be confined in a box that is comprised solely of what you think that is our version of the world.

Ask someone about how their day is going. What plans they have. What they wish to do with their time. Ask your friends to tell you something that happened to them recently. Tell them something of your own. Do not be afraid to share your own stories, as it will make them feel satisfied and trustworthy as well. Whenever you get the chance, just listen to others.

More often than not, you encounter days where you just want someone in your life. This can be triggered by watching romantic comedies, reading an article on the internet or seeing your best friend happily settled with someone. Yes, they come, and they’re perfectly natural, but are you sure that’s what you really want?

1. You’re just in love with the concept of love.

Cliché but this is most likely the situation if you think a relationship will save your life’s monotony. People always have a romanticized notion of what having a boyfriend or girlfriend would make them feel like. You toy with the idea of having someone constantly with you, the dates and the candlelit dinners, but the exhilaration of having one only lasts in its early stages. If you expect too much from it you might jump into the first potential relationship you find and end up disappointed.

2. Do you even know yourself well enough already?

It’s important to know yourself before becoming part of a relationship. If you don’t stand for anything, you’ll find yourself unconsciously giving too much and questioning if it was even enough. Set standards on the people you want to be in your life and how you want to be treated. Know what you’re worth and eventually, you’ll make him or her believe it too.

3. You just got out of one recently.

When you’ve just broken up with your ex, finding a rebound would seem like the most convenient solution. It’s an easy distraction from the past, all of a sudden your attention is claimed by someone else. However, this shortcut to recovery is also short-lived. If you’re not genuinely ready, it will show. Give it time, enjoy being single and save someone else from the heart ache.

4. You can’t even make yourself happy.

Some people assume that having a boyfriend or girlfriend is the ticket to happiness. They think that it will make things lighter and easier because there’s someone there to make them feel content. Though relationships may have this effect, you have to note that if your happiness is dependent on someone else and this person doesn’t meet those expectations, you’ll end up more miserable than you started. It’s your job to make yourself feel happy and fulfilled, with or without a partner. A relationship simply adds value to you but it shouldn’t be the one that completes you.

5. Will it fit in your priorities?

If you’re a person who has a vision and a plan, this is a good question to ask yourself. How will a romantic relationship fit in with your priorities? If you know that right now, you’re still building your career and there’s a lot at stake, is it the right time to have one? If you’re fully aware that it’s not one of your main concerns, there’s a high probability that you’ll take your partner for granted. It would be more beneficial and practical for you to allocate your time to what’s important to you as of the moment and avoid disappointing someone else.

It’s easy to be blinded by the media, past experiences but before you get consumed by your desire to have one or worse, be brought down by its current unattainability, be wise enough to think twice about it, what you want right now might not be what you need.

I’ll start running when the weather is nicer. I’ll start spending time with God  when I’m not overwhelmed by school or work. I’ll start eating healthy tomorrow, but I need cookies tonight… and tomorrow… and the next day. I’ll talk to that I’ll invite people over for dinner when I am finally able to catch a breath. I’ll start volunteering when I have more free time.

Sound familiar? Oh, how uncomfortable I am by the number of time I have used these very excuses. But you see, the weather gets nicer, and I’m still not running. Summer comes, and busy schedules/summer trips seem more important than spending time with my Creator. Tomorrow comes, and my sugar craving is even more intense than the day before. I’m writing this because I think you will continue to make excuses if I don't.You may have a habit of saying that you will start living when less busy, less tired, more motivated but once those moments come, you choose to replace them with something else–and the cycle repeats.

I’m starting to realize that if we don’t start now, we probably never will. We waste our time with meaningless fillers as we wait for the opportune moment to pursue what we want.

What is it that you want to accomplish? Maybe you want to get in shape, spend more time with God, get to know your neighbors, pursue a different job, start a blog… Whatever it is–and believe me, I’m speaking to myself more than anyone else–why don’t you start today instead of waiting for the perfect moment? If you are really honest with yourself, the perfect moment will never come.

Life is busy, distracting,complicated with limitless commitments and to-do lists that threaten to steal our time and attention.

You probably won’t be able to accomplish it all at once, but you’ve got to start somewhere. Besides, it’s much less intimidating to start small. Go for a short jog,wake up ten minutes earlier to just talk with God about your concerns, joys, fears,make a smoothie instead of reaching for another cookie..
Start with something small, and start today–or you probably never will.